Men usually hesitate to ask for a woman’s number because they are afraid of rejection. That’s all there is to it. Men hate to be rejected. Obviously, who likes to be rejected, right? Lol.
But that aside, what they don’t know is that sometimes that rejection happens for a reason – it’s nothing personal. It just that sometimes, women just refuse to give their numbers to strangers no matter how charming they are.
You cannot just walk up to a girl and ask for her number. As woman who is approached by guys several times each week, I still think that is just down right creepy and I walk away as fast as I can from guys like that.
But of course, in all fairness, I would still say that it ultimately depends on how the approach was done in the first place.
It’s important for men to know that they have to get the girl to like them first. He should gain a little of her trust to make her want to actually go out with him. The attempt to get a girl’s number requires some “skill” and a lot of practice.
The way most guys do it is by memorizing lines… real cheesy ones.
That’s so 1980.
In case you don’t already know – It’s all about making the girl feel comfortable with you. Comfortable is a VERY important keyword here.
When a girl is comfortable with you, it’s easy for you to proceed to the next level… and the next… and the next.
Therefore your goal is should always be to get her comfortable with you.
Some guys memorize so many cheesy pick-up lines to get a girl’s attention. Still there are ways on how to effectively get a girl’s number.
Take time to Observe
Most men fail in getting a woman’s number why?
Because they go straight to hitting on the girl without taking the time to get to know her a first. Smart guys take time to observe the woman from afar. This allows them to get details about her, which is crucial when he makes his move.
Focus on the details.
Is she tapping her feet to a certain kind of music? What kind of drink or food did she order? Is she wearing something you can compliment? Does she have a pet with her? Take note of details like these because they will come in handy during your conversation.
Women dig guys who notice the little things about them.
Most guys don’t, so you have to stand-out.
Most men make a fool of themselves when they panic in front of a girl. Some guys stutter. Some shake their knees while talking. Some even say things that don’t even make any sense. This happens when you don’t think things through before making your move. Rushing over to meet a girl for the first time isn’t a good idea. Having the “just do it” mentality is good, but “just doing” without having a plan, not so good ?
Before walking over to talk to a woman, be sure to have your nerves under wraps, make sure you have it under control. Be cool, chill. Organize your thoughts and actions before you go through with asking for a girl’s number. Breathe slowly and be confident that you look and smell great before you approach her.
Get her Attention
If you want to get her attention, sit or stand somewhere where she can see you, or better yet sit beside her at the bar. Try to mirror some of her movements as she shifts from one position to the other. Don’t be too obvious. This is a psychological technique to make a girl look and take notice of you. Blend into the environment.
Once you catch her looking at you, smile and say “Hi.” Of course, the tone of your voice is very important. A perky, pitchy and loud “Hi” may startle her and make her think you are weird. A very slow and sensual “Hi” can give her the wrong impression and scare her. Stay calm and casually say “Hi” in a way that she won’t be afraid of you. Moderation is key. If she smiles and says “hi” back to you then you can proceed to the next step.
I think twice myself before revealing to a guy my real name when they start a conversation by telling me theirs. I’ve been taught not to talk to strangers ever since I was a child. I’m not alone in this. Most fathers do the same, especially to their daughters. So it goes the same way with other women. It may not be best to start a conversation with telling a girl your name right away.
You can do it casually.
Start with a little icebreaker like “I really like this song, what about you?” (Referring to the song playing) or “this place is really hopping tonight huh?” These questions can easily be answered with a yes or no. From there, you can build up the conversation if you find that the topic is interesting to the girl.
When you have both exchanged some thoughts on a certain subject, you can slip in your introduction, “By the way, my name is…” And if you did pretty well, she would tell you her real name and will stay for a little more chat with you.
Now that the introductions are out of the way, you can put the details you’ve observed about her to use. It can be as simple as “That’s a nice bracelet. What is it made of?” or “I see you like R&B. Who is your favorite artist?” Any girl will be impressed of how attentive you are to her. You know, small talk. You get the drift.
It also helps to give her a little compliment like “You have an amazing smile.” Just don’t overdo it by saying things like “You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.” Of course you can do that, but if you’re still new at this, I’d recommend for you to just keep things simple.
Keep things believable and as much as possible… truthful. You wouldn’t need to remember things if they are true, right?
Of course, your first meeting shouldn’t feel like an interview or she might just walk away. Be sure to share a little about yourself too to keep her interested. Be sure that your stories are not boring the girl or driving her away. Never exaggerate or brag to impress a girl. It is better to be humble and modest about things. It is best to keep things real and be yourself. Above all, always have a good sense of humor and try to make her smile.
If things are going well and by the way she looks at you, you can tell that she would want to see you again, you can casually ask for her number. Of course, don’t just blurt out “Can I have your number”. That would really kill the moment. You can segue from a good laugh with something like “I would really want to get to know you more.” And if she smiles, you can go and ask,” What’s your number?”, then give your phone to her and go “You might as well just key it in yourself, easier that way”.
Or you can just say “Hey you know what? Why don’t you just give me a missed call, I’ll save it then”
The key thing here is for you to not make a big deal out of getting her number. If you make it a big deal, she will too. If you make it to be something really normal to you, she will too.
Small note : If you can’t get a phone number, try to ask for email or add her in your Facebook friend’s list. It could be something you can try because email might be less risk for them.